Aha!

I've been gone from Bloggerland for a while.  Things have been rather repetitive over here, and of course, in the back of my head has echoed the saying, "if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all."

Sometimes I feel that I'm adjusting to Michigan rather well.

A lot of days I do not.

Isaac and I will have our first marital counseling session next Wednesday.  The woman that we'll be working with has experience helping people cope with things, marital stressors, and academic pressures.  Things that we, as a couple, seem to need some help figuring out how to deal with.

I think it should be rather interesting.

Today was nice--it's the first day in a long time that we almost had an entire day with each other.  I got called into the salon for an appointment at 3 that lasted til about 6:30, but aside from that, we had some much-needed one-on-one time together.

I had another little meltdown this morning.  Isaac started to do what he usually does--lay me down and let me cry myself to sleep--but I found that I really didn't want him to leave me.  I learned that I felt alone.  Often times he'll be sitting no more than a few feet from me, but this morning I felt as though I finally realized that one thing I miss quite a bit is my best friend.

My husband.

I miss hanging out with him all day, doing nothing but stupid stuff like going to Wal-Mart so we can walk around and laugh and the goofy things we find.  I miss laying down in his arms at night with the window open so we can hear the breeze rustle the tree leaves.  I miss telling him stuff.  Experiencing things with him.

It feels at this point, our lives are the same every day.  We talk about the same two things: med school and Nordstrom.  Occasionally the salon as well.  We just don't do much...

An upside to realizing this is that now that we've recognized it, we can hopefully take steps to address it.  However, med school isn't going away any time soon, and neither are my jobs.  Additionally, there isn't much to DO out here unless you shop, drink, or eat.  So there may only be so much we can do.

But for today, I feel accomplished.  An aspect of my sadness was finally recognized, and that alone makes me feel better.

A side note: I have a PET scan coming up on the same day we start counseling, so hopefully that will be clear and spot-free.  I'm planning on it.